Most who are successful in their recovery will readily admit that whenever they addressed their anger and resentment-in whatever form it took and for whatever reason it was there-that was when they really turned the corner. Of course there are the few who somehow stopped drinking or using and stayed angry. What are they called? Dry drunks? But the numbers of people who relapse due to resentment far outweighs them. You simply better your odds tremendously by getting rid of it. Anger that lingers becomes resentment. Someone once said, "Carrying resentment for someone who offended me is like me drinking poison and expecting you to die." In other words, I'm the one who suffers, not you. In kindergarten, many were led to touch noses with the person who made you mad. Resentment will have none of that. "No, I want to stay mad." There's only one problem with that. It guarantees that you will never be happy. You simply cannot be angry and happy at the same time. Now some people have negotiated a compromise here. "What do you mean? Of course you can." But they are actually in a state of downgraded happiness. But to the addict or alcoholic, you cannot afford to compromise. And that's your dilemma. However, it takes only a little thought to realize that, "If I let go of my anger, I guess I would be happier overall." And that's the point. In the next article, let's discuss real and practical ways to manage anger in a healthy way.
February 16, 2017